Archive | February 2016

What Is Narcissistic Abuse?

images (16)Narcissists don’t really love themselves. Actually, they’re driven by shame. It’s the idealized image of themselves, which they convince themselves they embody, that they admire. But deep down, narcissists feel the gap between the façade they show the world and their shame-based self. They work hard to avoid feeling that shame. This gap is true for other codependents, as well, but a narcissist uses defense mechanisms that are destructive to relationships and cause pain and damage to their loved ones’ self-esteem. (Learn the traits required to diagnose a Narcissistic personality disorder, “NPD.”)

Many of the narcissist’s coping mechanisms are abusive-hence the term, “narcissistic abuse.” However, someone can be abusive, but not be a narcissist. Addicts and people with other mental illnesses, such as bi-polar disorder and anti-social personality disorder (sociopathy) and borderline personality disorders are also abusive, as are many codependents without a mental illness. Abuse is abuse, no matter what is the abuser’s diagnosis. If you’re a victim of abuse, the main challenges for you are:

  • Clearly identifying it;
  • Building a support system; and
  • Learning how to strengthen and protect yourself.

What is Narcissistic Abuse
Abuse may be mental, physical, financial, spiritual, or sexual. Here are a few examples of abuse you may not have identified:

  • Verbal abuse: Includes belittling, bullying, accusing, blaming, shaming, demanding, ordering, threatening, criticizing, sarcasm, raging, opposing, undermining, interrupting, blocking, and name-calling. Note that many people occasionally make demands, use sarcasm, interrupt, oppose, criticize, blame, or block you. Consider the context, malice, and frequency of the behavior before labeling it narcissistic abuse.
  • Manipulation: Generally, manipulation is indirect influence on someone to behave in a way that furthers the goals of the manipulator. Often, it expresses covert aggression. Think of a “wolf in sheep’s clothing.” On the surface, the words seem harmless – even complimentary; but underneath you feel demeaned or sense a hostile intent. If you experienced manipulation growing up, you may not recognize it as such.
  • Emotional blackmail: Emotional blackmail may include threats, anger, warnings, intimidation, or punishment. It’s a form of manipulation that provokes doubt in you. You feel fear, obligation, and or guilt, sometimes referred to as “FOG”
  • Gaslighting: Intentionally making you distrust your perceptions of reality or believe that you’re mentally incompetent.
  • Competition: Competing and one-upping to always be on top, sometimes through unethical means. E.g. cheating in a game.
  • Negative contrasting: Unnecessarily making comparisons to negatively contrast you with the narcissist or other people.
  • Sabotage: Disruptive interference with your endeavors or relationships for the purpose of revenge or personal advantage.
  • Exploitation and objectification: Using or taking advantage of you for personal ends without regard for your feelings or needs.
  • Lying: Persistent deception to avoid responsibility or to achieve the narcissist’s own ends.
  • Withholding: Withholding such things as money, sex, communication or affection from you.
  • Neglect: Ignoring the needs of a child for whom the abuser is responsible. Includes child endangerment; i.e., placing or leaving a child in a dangerous situation.
  • Privacy invasion: Ignoring your boundaries by looking through your things, phone, mail; denying your physical privacy or stalking or following you; ignoring privacy you’ve requested.
  • Character assassination or slander: Spreading malicious gossip or lies about you to other people.
  • Violence: This includes blocking your movement, pulling hair, throwing things, or destroying your property.
  • Financial abuse: Financial abuse might include controlling you through economic domination or draining your finances through extortion, theft, manipulation, or gambling, or by accruing debt in your name or selling your personal property.
  • Isolation: Isolating you from friends, family, or access to outside services and support through control, manipulation, verbal abuse, character assassination, or other means of abuse.

Narcissism and the severity of abuse exist on a continuum. It may range from ignoring your feelings to violent aggression. Typically, narcissists don’t take responsibility for their behavior and shift the blame to you or others; however, some do and are capable of feeling guilt and self-reflection.

Malignant Narcissism and Sociopathy
Someone with more narcissistic traits who behaves in a malicious, hostile manner is considered to have “malignant narcissism.” Malignant narcissists aren’t bothered by guilt. They can be sadistic and take pleasure in inflicting pain. They can be so competitive and unprincipled that they engage in anti-social behavior. Paranoia puts them in a defensive-attack mode as a means of self-protection.

Malignant narcissism can resemble sociopathy. Sociopaths have malformed or damaged brains. They display narcissistic traits, but not all narcissists are sociopathic. Their motivations differ. Whereas narcissists prop up an ideal persona to be admired, sociopaths change who they are in order to achieve their self-serving agenda. They need to win at all costs and think nothing of breaking social norms and laws. They don’t attach to people as narcissists do. Narcissists don’t want to be abandoned. They’re codependent on others’ approval, but sociopaths can easily walk away from relationships that don’t serve them. Although some narcissists will occasionally plot to obtain their objectives, they’re usually more reactive than sociopaths, who coldly calculate their plans.

Get Help
If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, it’s important to get outside support to understand clearly what’s going on, to rebuild your self-esteem and confidence, and to learn to communicate effectively and set boundaries. Doing the exercises in my books and e-workbooks, particularly “Dealing with a Narcissist: 8 Steps to Raise Self-Esteem and Set Boundaries with Difficult People” will help you make changes. If you feel in danger, don’t believe broken promises. Get immediate help, and read, “The Truth about Domestic Violence and Abusive Relationships.”

Domestic Violence and Patriarchy

images (17)It’s an ongoing tragedy in every country and in many cases there is murder or severe maiming of victims of domestic violence. In Australia it is a focus of government and civil organisations who are attempting to stamp it out but the root cause is rarely questioned – patriarchy. Male children learn from birth that they are ‘special’ and they are treated with rights and a degree of respect not usually accorded to females.

Women are victims from the start because they are weaker, gentler, less intimidating, and above all not considered to be ‘god-like’. Patriarchy started when men decided they could rise up with the sun and ‘marry’ Mary, the sun-star of Babylon. The name means ‘mother’s powerful eye’. It was shown to me in a vision when the dawn’s light penetrated a hole in a stone held aloft for that reason. The magnificent colored moving rings of light are awesome and good enough for early man to worship.

Following my reincarnation and with a strong link to the Spirit of the universe it commissioned me to tear down the wall of blindness that it created. We are in the last days when it was promised that all things will be explained. It starts with the rise of patriarchy and will end with the destruction of the earth as we know it because all systems are from the brain of Constantine, second beast of Revelation and 666 (Revelation 13:12-18).

What he put in place strengthened the wall of blindness that arose in Babylon, the home of Islam. It was occupied by the Amors who took it to the world as they conquered nation after nation and gave them a new identity. They built Roma (reverse Amor) and their previous history was buried.

Constantine was an Amorite and he established the Catholic Church in 325 AD based on Islamic principles. He put up Jesus Christ as its Saviour and reinstated Mary as the Mother of God. He also introduced the systems of government, succession, finance, and the law. His ways are at the root of the World Order and his religion has dominated man’s thinking ever since.

Religions teach patriarchal notions to children and in some cases the discrimination against women sees them murdered in the streets or beaten to death by members of their own family. This is so ingrained in the minds of people in certain countries and societies that it cannot be erased. It is God’s way of dealing with man’s gross stupidity as the end approaches.

 

The 7 Critical Steps an Abused Woman Needs to Take in the Journey Towards Empowerment

images (14)What new thoughts does a woman living in an abusive relationship need to embrace to start feeling empowered in her life?

Unless women in abusive relationships get clear about the beliefs that program their thoughts and actions, they will not be aware of why they do things or the way they do things when they do them – they thus continue to find themselves stuck and remain in abusive, intolerable situations for longer than is necessary.

We are talking about a shift in paradigms.

Paradigms are thought patterns and beliefs that guide HOW WE THINK, BEHAVE AND ACT.

Here are 7 paradigm shifts that a woman living in an abusive, toxic relationship needs to make in order to feel a sense of empowerment in her life.

1) Let Go of Drama: Abusive relationships can be filled with lots of acting out, drama and noise. It is thus easy to get stuck in a position of always reacting and being sucked into the noxious behaviour of others.

Empowered women focus on staying centered. They put their energies into determining how they think, feel and act and thus do not get drawn into someone else’s bad behaviour.

2) Define Your Own Beliefs and Values: Women who live in abusive relationships not only struggle with a sense of who they are and what’s important to them, they struggle with issues around entitlement and the idea of embracing that they not only need to have their own beliefs and values, but that they have a right to live by them.

Empowered women not only take the time to think through what is important to them, they know that they are entitled, and have a right to have their own beliefs and values, and make every effort to live by them.

3) Let Go of Co-dependency: Women living in abusive relationships tend to put their focus on what the other person is thinking, doing and feeling, rather than defining themselves and their own needs. Their sense of self is often defined by the other person in the relationship and is located outside of themselves. They thus look to the other person in the relationship to enhance their self-esteem and self-worth, so that they can feel more positive about themselves.

Empowered women prioritize their own needs and know that this is not being selfish but that it is vital and necessary to their wellbeing. They understand that their self-esteem and sense of self-worth is located within them and not outside of them. They thus take responsibility for their own feelings, behaviour and actions.

4) Develop Reality-based Relationships: Women in abusive relationships often find themselves living in relationships based on hope and have difficulty acknowledging the reality of their situation. This allows them to continuously minimize poor behaviour and propel into a future of fantasy wishful thinking which is not grounded in present reality.

Empowered women pay attention to their partner’s actions and behaviours and call them on it; they don’t just focus on listening to their words, they pay attention to their behaviour and look for congruency. They stay grounded in the present and the here and now.

5) Learn and Understand Child Development. Women in abusive relationships are often unaware of the impact that aggressive, hostile behaviour can have on the developing minds of their children. Research in the area of child development tends to reinforce that the early years continue to be of prime importance.

Empowered women take the time to learn and understand more about their child’s growth and development. They understand that Children are like sponges and soak up what they see and hear. They know that a continuous hostile and unhealthy environment is detrimental to a child’s ability to learn and grow in a healthy way.

6) Take Responsibility for Their Personal Safety: Women living in abusive relationships can tend to lack an awareness of just how important their role as primary caregiver is to their children; thus they can minimize the impact and fear that their children experience when they witness and hear the person they depend on being mistreated.

Empowered women take action and take control of their personal safety as best they can, thereby relieving their children of this burden and responsibility; in so doing they reduce their children’s potential for hyper-vigilance, fear and anxiety.

7) Understand the Importance of Role Modeling: Women in abusive relationships are inclined to minimize and can even dismiss the importance of the impact of what their children see and hear in terms of how genders relate to each other. They tend to unrealistically think that their love can overcome the negative effects of aggressive bad behaviour.

Empowered women understand that parents are teachers, and are thus responsible for modeling appropriate and respectful behaviours to their children, in order for them to grow up to be responsible, law-abiding people with good social skills. They understand that much of this modeling is done within the context of family life.

Gaslighting – Effects & Warning Signs

download (22)Effects & Warning Signs of Gaslighting and the Unfortunate Predicament of Targets/Victims:

This article focuses on gaslighting, its effects & warning signs. During the process of gaslighting, targets find themselves going through unfamiliar and uncomfortable emotional and psychological states of mind that are confusing causing a great deal of anxiety. If the only support system available to a target is the abuser, then psychological damage is a certainty. Robin Stern, Ph.D. speaks of three stages the target will go through in her book “The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your LIfe”. She also goes on to list a number of warning flags to look for in determining whether you are being gaslighted. Her book is an excellent resource for anyone wanting to learn more about this evil and sadistic trait found in the narcopath. My article merely expands on her analysis.

The three stages a target experiences are:

Disbelief:

Gaslighting is an extreme form of emotional abuse used by the narcissistic gaslighter to manipulate you, the innocent target (gaslightee). The effects of gaslighting are so insidious, that they can lead to you to losing all trust in your own judgment and reality. Indeed, your first reaction to what the narcopath is saying is one of utter disbelief; you can’t believe this sudden change in attitude toward you. Since I’s likely you’ve never heard the term gaslighting, you don’t believe you are being manipulated in the first place. All you know is that something terribly odd is happening in the relationship, but you can’t quite put your finger on it. Of course, this is precisely what the narcopath wants, after all, it would not work if you knew what was happening. The methods used by the narcopath in the idealization stage of the relationship progresses in such a way that it virtually guarantees you are hooked utterly and completely to your narcopathic abuser. Blinded by love after been totally seduced, you naturally trust that the narcopath loves you equally, but of course, this is a false assumption. Where once the narcopath’s communication style with you was accessible and stayed within the boundaries of the relationship, it is now a twisted system of blocking and diverting. All you know is that where you once were held in “high esteem” by your partner or co-worker or family member, they have now become highly critical of you. The sympathy and support that had been available now turns to disdain and antagonism. Whenever you (the gaslightee) want to reasonably discuss what is happening in the relationship, you are met by a wall of silence, or worse, you are mocked and every issue you raise is twisted and/or trivialized.

It is important to realize that the gaslighting does not need to be severe to have severe consequences on the target; subtle remarks, such as being told that “you are so sensitive”, or “didn’t I ask you to do —, nevermind, I’ll do it myself”. Even though you rationalize in your own mind that these statements are untrue, gradually your confidence is eroding away to such an extent that find yourself doubting your own memory about the smallest of details, like your keys aren’t where you left them. The narcopath denies moving the keys, and when you finally find them, the negative comments reinforce these doubts, creating huge confusion in your mind. Another example is when he or she tells you something, then later denies ever saying such a thing. All of this psychological warfare has the effect of increasing your anxiety about your memory and perception of events. Desperate for the gaslighter’s approval and reassurance that you aren’t going crazy, you find yourself depending on your narcopathic abuser for a sense of reality.

Defense:

At this stage you still have enough of yourself to fight and defend yourself against the gaslighting manipulation. However, the narcopath’s “gaslighting” is beginning to do what it is intended to do, that is, to throw you off-balance by creating self-doubt, angst, turmoil, and guilt. This emotional damage causes you, over time, to lose your sense of reality, and sense of self. Becoming lost, confused, and unable to trust your own instincts and memory, you tend to isolate yourself, even in your own home. Before long your psychic energy is depleted, and you are left unable to defend yourself from the horrendous gaslighting effect. At this stage your whole system may feel that it is in danger of annihilation.

From birth, nature builds in unconscious defense mechanisms and adaptive behaviors to protect the child from annihilation from early trauma, and these same defenses remain throughout life whenever we are vulnerable to highly stressful experiences that threaten us with annihilation. When the child starts life, they experience the world as a frightening place, so to reduce their fear they need to form an emotional bond with somebody in order to reduce their stress and anxiety. They identify and bond with their mother (usually the main caregiver), and of course, they are very likely, at some time in the future, to experience her as their first aggressor when she punishes them for wrongdoing. “Mother” can be experienced by the child as being both “threatening and kind”, and this seems to lead to the child turning to emotional bonding for survival. This psychological condition is known today as the “Stockholm Syndrome”. It is found universally in situations where people are held captive and in fear of their lives; as in kidnapping, hostage situations, and narcopathic abuse. This phenomenon of trauma bonding with the narcopathic aggressor can be found in Narcissistic Target Syndrome. In the Stockholm Syndrome, the target adapts to the traumatic situation by unconsciously going into a regressive mode, where they return to childish infantile patterns of behavior, and bond with their captor as they did with their mother earlier in life as a defense against annihilation. In order to cope with the discomfort of living within such madness, the targets motivational drive provides a way that they can rationalize to reduce the dissonance they are experiencing (Cognitive Dissonance). It is imperative to understand the dynamics of all these defense mechanisms, so you will be able to appreciate why you stayed in the abusive relationship as long as you did. You adapted by adopting an unconscious self-survival strategy.

Depression:

By this stage you hardly recognize yourself. You are quickly becoming a shadow of your former self. Living under tyranny within a war zone where you are controlled, physically and emotionally battered, unable to make decisions, subjected to constant rages, sucked dry, stripped of dignity and safety, you just exist. You start feeling like you can’t do anything right any more, you don’t feel that you can trust your own mind, and you withdraw with a skewed reality of what is really happening around you. You escape into depression.

Many targets will also go on to experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). The diagnosis of PDSD can be made based on certain symptoms being present, and these symptoms fall into three categories:

1. Reliving: (Flashbacks, intrusive imagery, nightmares, anxiety, etc.)

2. Avoidance: (Avoiding people, places or thoughts, emotional numbing, lack of interest, hopelessness, etc.)

3. Arousal: (Difficulty concentrating, irritability, outbursts of anger, insomnia, hyper-vigilance, etc.)

In my observation and research, I have noticed that targets are brought to self-annihilation and death on many levels while on the receiving end of gaslighting behavior. When you are on the journey to recovery, it’s extremely important to take care and time to educate yourself about what was happening to you. As difficult as it may be, you must look back on the abusive behavior as your story unfolds. You will likely experience an array of responses, from shock, disbelief, profound sadness, guilt, shame, anger, fear, reflection, loneliness and an array of physical symptoms (panic attacks, flashbacks, anxious negative thoughts, fatigue, eating disorders, dissociation, etc.), but the relief at finally knowing what was really going on in the relationship is well worth reliving the journey. This is a process that takes time and patience, and ideally should be done with an experienced therapist or counselor.

I think many of the stages of your recovery are very similar to Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’ stages of grief, which are Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. It is amazing at how surprisingly resilient gaslighting targets are, and that they survived the torturous effects of the disorganized anti-social personality disordered person who entered their life. This is, in itself a miracle, and a testament to the human spirit.

What are the warning signs of Gaslighting?

Second-guessing: Because a target has had their confidence eroded by the constant gaslighting, they live in fear of doing the wrong thing, and making their situation even more dangerous for themselves. They invariably find themselves asking “what if”, and always trying to second guess themselves. This often effects how they problem-solve, and make decisions in their life.

Asking “Am I too sensitive?”: Projection and blame are the hallmarks of gaslighting, and the target become hyper-sensitive to the constant humiliation of their abuser. They hear countless times that they are “too sensitive”, that they soon begin to believe the lies. As a result, they look for approval before doing anything, fearful that they will make more mistakes that will end in more humiliation. This form of gaslighting makes the target doubt everything about themselves, so they constantly ask, “Am I being too sensitive”.

Apologizing: Living with the narcissistic Dr. Jekyll and Mr/s Hyde, the target finds themselves always apologizing for “never doing things right”, they even apologize for their very existence; it is a way of avoiding more conflict with their aggressor. Apology is not just something the target does to be polite; it is a powerful strategy for staying safe while in the war zone, and a means to disarm the anger of the gaslighter. Most importantly, the power of apology is that it can take the shame off the narcissist and redirect it towards the target, therefore avoiding some of the narcissists rage.

Lack joy and happiness in life (melancholy): If one lives under the constant tyranny of the gaslighting narcissist, they can expect extremes of lethal hostility. Many targets go through physical and mental torture that can cause them to suffer a personality change, leaving them feeling confused, lonely, frightened and unhappy. Often they continue to carry this melancholy even after they escape from the abuser.

Withholding information from others: Targets experience great shame about their situation; they get tired of trying to cover up their abuse as they go along. When well-meaning friends and family members tell them they see the abuse, they avoid the subject, and soon they learn to withhold giving more information in order to avoid further conflict. The importance of shame in narcopathic abuse is a difficult issue, but I don’t think it is too difficult to accept that the crimes of the gaslighting narcopath stigmatized the target to their very core. Their shame is a normal response to the social failure they so often feel as a result of their abuse (i.e. the shame of being unable to protect themselves from their abuse). This shame can be seen as defensiveness and withdrawal by others. The relationship between shame and social support is a complex issue in and of itself, and too lengthy to discuss here.

Knowing something is terribly wrong, but can’t figure out what: The goal of gaslighting is to control and influence the reality of the gaslightee. It only works when the target is unaware of what is really happening. The more the target doubts their own reality or competence, the more dependent they become of the abuser. It is a vicious circle of events that is totally confusing to the target, and that is exactly what the gaslighter wants.

Difficulty making simple decisions: Caught in the narcissistic web of deception and illusion is the equivalent to a fly trapped in the spider’s web. When entering the web, does the target know that it is about to be bound up and eaten alive any more than the fly? The answer is “no”. However, the narcopathic web is akin to the disintegration of self. The target, under the threat of continual danger, forms a psychic bond with the abuser in order to avoid fragmentation of the self. In forming that bond they are compelled to organize themselves around their idealized abuser’s desires, and surrender their authentic potential: Having to ask permission to do anything, not being allowed to have their own opinion, never allowed to win the argument, constantly being chastised and humiliated, compromising their own thoughts, values, needs, and belief. Understandably, caught in this web they lose all autonomy, even their ability to make decisions for their own self.

You have the sense that you used to be a very different person: more confident, more fun-loving, and more relaxed: In order to survive, the target enters into what is termed the “the narcissists dance”. This is an unconscious defense mechanism which helps to keep the target safe, but in so doing they almost lose themselves by placating, complying, and appeasing. This becomes part of their way of being, a great “pleaser” with everybody. Unless this unconscious dance is exposed in therapy, and the target educated about narcissistic behavior, they are actually left vulnerable to becoming Narcissistic Supply yet again. The reason is that they are conditioned (like Pavlov’s dogs) in a way that makes them a target for other hungry narcissists, who are always on the hunt for new supply, and are quick to spot those primed already.

You feel hopeless and joyless: What had once seemed like heaven has now turned into a hell. There is no peace or joy in this place, just fear and suppression. Life loses all hope, as if the light has been turned off. All that remains is the deep black cloud of depression. And the target is forced to live in a state of acquiescence in order to survive.

Their perceptions of reality are continually undermined by the gaslighting sham, so they end up losing confidence in their intuition, memory, or reasoning powers. They are spun lies, lies that tell them that they are over-sensitive, imagining, unreasonable, irrational, over-reacting, and that they have no right to be upset. Hearing this time and again, their reality is turned inside out, and they begin to believe that this may all be true.

The narcopath’s form of psychological abuse has managed to instill in their target an extreme sense of anxiety and confusion to the point where they no longer trust their own memory, perception or judgment. In this state they are truly a hostage. However, many manage to get the courage to break free, but this is usually after several painful attempts to do so. But when they do finally break free (escape is a more apt term), they will need lots of support, understanding, coaching, counseling and in some instances, professional therapy. I urge you to read “The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your LIfe” by Robin Stern, Ph.D.

The first step in recovering from brainwashing by gaslighting is to find a therapist or counselor who has a firm grasp on this brainwashing technique, and with his/her guidance you familiarize yourself with the common narcopathic traits of gaslighting and how it affects you, even after the relationship has ended. This is a critical step that cannot be skipped, because you, the former target (survivor) must be able to recognize the narcopath at work. In this way you take back your reality and power. This part of your recovery equips you to guard against further gaslighting by the narcopath when he/she starts hoovering to reclaim their energy source. There is no time period on this recovery process. Recovery from narcopath abuse is in stages and can take months, even years for total recovery. However, never underestimate the power of humans to bounce back from anything. The fact that you survived such extreme abuse is testament to your strength and determination. The resilience of the human spirit is simply amazing.

 

Domestic Violence and Discrimination Against Women

images (15)While governments are working to try to resolve this issue they have not realised the role religions play in the behaviour of many men. Women are blamed for their sins as their minds are unable to get away from the Adam and Eve story. In it Eve caused Adam to sin and was, therefore, the evil personification of all women that lead men astray. They have never stopped the punishment because no one has told them how the story is a lie.

Following my reincarnation and with a strong link to the Spirit it commissioned me to tear down the wall that hides the truth and restore its people. It then took me on a huge learning curve to understand where the myths on which religions are based have their roots. In order to complete the mission many visions were also given.

In one such vision a line stretched out in front and along it were people. An extremely bright light rose from me and it arched over the line to the far end where EVE was written in large capital letters. The middle was labelled NOON and my position as EVENING. The bright light is the Spirit of the real God and Eve means ‘eye of life’. The ends were, therefore, extremely bright but the middle was in darkness.

The vision showed that Eve was not a woman but the Spirit of the Universe and it entered a group of people and seeded them with life. They have been nurtured, broken down, and rebuilt many times as torture and death came their way throughout the course of the length of the day. It is some 4,000 years long as Jesus Christ was the man on the cross at noon where there was no light.

The reason is because the so-called Saviour was an invention by Constantine who established the Roman Catholic Church in 325 AD. He was Islamic and an Amorite. The Amors resided originally in the city of Babylon and the sun-star image, Mary, was the foundation of organised religion. They are better known as the Persians who built a huge empire throughout Mesopotamia.

They expanded into the Mediterranean and built their new Capital ‘Roma’, which is ‘Amor’ in reverse. As the Romans they continued to grow their empire based on the same principles. The emperor put Mary in it as the Mother of God because the people would never have abandoned her. Brainwashed from birth they grow up with her as their chief god and they are encouraged to pray to her constantly.

Priests are celebrant because they are supposedly ‘married’ to ‘Mary’. Men died on crosses at Easter (eye-star) to mate with the Queen of Heaven and live as her ‘star’ forever in Paradise or heaven. These places do not exist and hell is the threat waiting to grab people if they leave. It forms the perfect trap because it is based on one’s fear and the instinct of flight to escape it.

The paranoia surrounding the myths of religion has been directed at women because of the stories that are false. Women have suffered long and hard at the hands of men who constantly punish them for being who they are. Now is the time of judgement for we are at the end of the day when the light is once more bright because the Spirit is revealing all.